I Don't Feel Tardy
I always used to wonder how a person could abandon his or her website. There's always so much going on, how could you ever run out of things to say? Or how could you put so much energy into something and then just stop doing it?

Now I get it. I'm not saying I want to abandon my website. Just that I can understand how this could happen.

The past couple of weeks every post has been like pulling teeth. It's like I just don't want to talk about it. It all seems too boring or too hard to put into words. Or whatever. Not in the mood.

There are some things going on which I don't care to talk about at this time but go under the general umbrella topic of change.

I'm not a person who embraces change. I did not grow up in a house where risk-taking was encouraged. I've managed to set up my life with very little stress and a built up a fine and heavily padded comfort zone and comfort zones within my comfort zone. I think it's probably good for me to step out of the comfort zone for a change but I'm not enjoying it and feel like I'm always on the verge of either throwing up or bursting into tears. Or both at the same time.

More on this as it develops.


This morning we went to the Farmer's Market in Portland. It's bigger and has different vendors and Bob has been trying to talk me into going over there with him for a couple of weeks. I had on light pants and a sleeveless top and I considered that I might want a sweater. But c'mon, it's August. How can I wear a sweater in August? I was cold the whole time and grateful when we finally got back in the car.

Meanwhile, I'm cold and glum and we went to the coffee stand and somehow they gave me the wrong drink which I didn't notice until we'd wandered around a bit. So I hiked back to the stand and they were like, "Yeah, there's was a person with the same name so you took the wrong drink." A customer stood next to me and said, "Yeah, it was mine." "Sorry," I said and then they deigned to make me a replacement drink, like they were doing me a favor.

Isn't there some basic tenet of business where you don't make the customer feel like shit when a mistake is made? Especially since I didn't make the mistake. By my reasoning, they served me the wrong drink. The customer should be giving them the stink eye and they should be apologizing to me. That added to my dark mood.

But we did find a giant fabulous piece of fresh salmon for dinner tonight. Fresh salmon will save me.

This is the current state of my front yard pumpkin patch. It's bursting. The other photo is an osprey family on the Columbia River.