I usually like to be a little bit prepared before I start typing the blog but tonight I thought I'd go by the seat of my pants. Not like I'm trying out for the Olympics or anything.

Today we saw Shrek which I thought was hilarious. Yesterday we watched Oscar & Lucinda on tape and I'd advise missing it if you haven't already. It's a well made movie and the acting is fabulous but the story had some problems which might work in a book but didn't work in a movie and I won't go into the whole thing now. On Friday we saw Planet of the Apes in a theater with me and 50 guys Bob's age. I LOVED it. I would see it again. I'm not in the mood to explain why I liked it, let's just say it entertained me and there was fighting and apes and Helena Bonham Carter with the most swell ape-doo you've ever seen and Marky Wahlberg dreamy air force guy.

Last week I tried to get all my various emails organized. I finally have a separate email for work: pam(at)lwilder.com and that is aliased to another address (I'm not sure if my terminology is right so bear with me) and then I have my domain and my alias that goes with that and then I have my yahoo mail so all together I have all these addresses I am juggling around and trying to keep all the passwords straight and pay attention to my sig files because last week I wrote an email to the webmaster about the gov't site I complained about in my last blog post and then realized I had my personal sig file with my blog.html URL right there. How professional. My little struggle with technology.

Oh, also, we just started watching Jiminy Glick. I am not a Martin Short fan but I am telling you, this show is HILARIOUS.

I also finished re-reading Little Friday this weekend which I will write more about later.

argh Have you ever had to deal with a government agency? Well, at work I have to do this all the time and based on my experiences I find it hard to believe that this country runs at all. I needed to track down information on this government program which took me *9* contacts -- phone calls transferred here and there and then routed to a website and I contacted that person by email who directed me to a different person by email who directed me to another website. Okay, so I have the correct website but gee, NONE of the links work. So I contact the web admin and *get this* I need to UPGRADE my web browser to view the friggin information. Hear that noise? That's me screaming my head off.

This is a GOVERNMENT agency. Their job is to make this information available. They aren't trying to sell a Porsche. They're not Dreamworks. They are a friggin government agency and I should not have to do ANYTHING in order to access this information. And while I'm on the subject I have to say that about 90% of the government websites I visit are ugly, have horrible download times and are often confusing to navigate.

omigod. I put 4 more volumes of the pamnewsletter online this weekend. I'd try to type a URL for the blog but I'm afraid the process would force me to put my eyes out. You'd think transfering the pages over to the new site would be easier than it is, but for some reason I slightly altered my folder structure and it's making everything a giant pain in the ass. What was I thinking?

It took me about 15 minutes just to get the Secrets of the Louvre link right. I was ready to dropkick Yoda (my iMac) into the backyard before I finally got it right. I think I still have a few screwed up links but I'll leave those for another day.

Tonight we went to McMenamins in Vancouver for dinner and I had the hummus plate. I should have my own hummus restaurant. It's my favorite food. I can't believe there is a www.hummus URL -- I typed it into my computer as a joke.

I'm reading my manuscript Little Friday this weekend because I'm doing a writing workshop for specifically that in a couple of weeks. I haven't looked at it for 2 years and it's not as dreadful as I had convinced myself. There is some tweaking to be done, but I still think it works. More on this exercise as it develops.

This weekend there was free cable because the shameless money grubbing capitalists better known as AT&T are doing a drive for our tax refund checks. Bastards. (Long, long rant omitted.) I taped Pitch Black because I always wanted to see it and I liked it -- esp. when that thing bit that guy's head off in a spray of blood. We also taped Trekkies and all I can say is, don't miss this movie. I can totally relate to the obsessed fandom and I am happy that it exists in this country -- but mygod, are there some freaks in that universe. Fun freaks, but freaks, nonetheless.

Keeping up with the blog is much harder than you might guess. It's not even my intention to post every day.

I'm going to Norman, Oklahoma in October for Returning the Gift X. Just this week I decided to do some homework and check airfare, etc. So guess what 2 of the 3 airlines that fly into Oklahoma City are? Yes, Delta and Southwest. How unlucky is that? It's not even that I have too much pride to give the two suckiest airlines another try -- but I've been getting contacted by their shills since I posted those stories -- how do I know they don't have my name in their systems and will torture me on purpose, just to get me? I guess that's a little paranoid. I'm guessing I will take Delta over SW since I haven't been to Salt Lake City for awhile (ahem) and because I would happily pay an extra $20 to get an assigned seat. What some people are willing to put up with to save a buck, I do not understand. Oh, and the 3rd airline is American and maybe I just didn't understand how their webpage worked but when I check on a fare it was $1100 -- I'd rather walk.

Baking update -- made a Cooks Illustrated recipe for biscotti yesterday and I think both Bob and I will require extensive dental work. These things are like little rocks. They taste good though.

Blog catch up day.

New Yorker - Finished at Last
We got our last New Yorker on our subscription over the weekend. I was only one behind at that point but I sat down and plowed through both issues and now I'm done. No renewal for us, I like the magazine but it's too much -- I'm going to read some books for a change.

PIE CRUST BREAKTHROUGH
After troubleshooting my pie crust for the past couple of months I think I figured out part of my problem. One of my foolproof pie tips said to be careful not to use too much water. So all this time I've been adding the most skimpy amounts of water. This last pie I put the entire amount the recipe called for -- didn't even add a tablespoon at a time, I just poured it all in and hey, what do you know. The crust actually held together. I guess it was a little tough. But at least it went into the pie plate without a struggle.

HOLLAND CLOSES
Just because a restaurant has been around for a long time and lots of people go there doesn't mean it is good. Case in point: The Holland. This was a restaurant in downtown Vancouver and we've been there for breakfast a couple of times -- usually because it's a convenient place to meet the in-laws if there are relatives in town. I never liked it. I'm completely challenged when it comes to breakfast foods I will eat so I was pretty much limited to the oatmeal and even that was icky. Last time I was there it had obviously been sitting under the lamp -- nice skin on top. I mean, come on, how hard is it to serve an edible bowl of oatmeal? But my reasons for not liking it go beyond that and now that I'm sitting here typing this I can't even articulate them.

We drove by there a week or two ago and the Holland was closed and I didn't didn't feel sorry. There was an article in the paper and Bob saw it and asked why they closed it and I just said, "Because it was a bad restaurant." I didn't even read the article.

I came back from basket camp on June 9 and I've been on an anti-domestic chore kick ever since. Especially cooking. I just don't have the energy or motivation to get fancy. I can't explain it except to say that I'm overwhelmed with the care and feeding of this other person and yah, he does take care of it himself sometimes, but mainly it seems up to me and I just get sick of it. Lately we've been having a lot of things that can be defrosted and heated up and served with a green salad which I've been making by the bale since the farmers market started. Last Thursday I bought a bunch of spreads and dips and a baguette and crackers and some vegan chicken mcnuggets and Annie's BBQ sauce and that was dinner. It worked.

Today I was coming back from my errands just as I turned into the courtyard right by our office I saw this large bird on the sidewalk clutching a flapping sparrow under its feet. It took me a second to register what was happening, it was so out of place. I realized it was a hawk -- that close to me. Sometimes when I see a hawk, it looks sort of shabby, but this one looked dangerously beautiful. I stopped and tried to blend into the scenery because I wanted to watch. The hawk just stood there, regarding me, and then took the flapping sparrow and flew to a nearby tree.

I very slowly walked to where I could see up into the tree and the hawk looked down at me with these intense eyes -- it was a little unsettling. The poor sparrow continued to flap in vain. Finally the hawk took off again and I didn't see where it went.

ug, what a wretched day. People can be so aggravating. If you can conduct business in a pleasant way or a nasty way, why not just pick nice. I don't understand. And if I already sent you the crap you need, don't call me and ask for it again. The biggest crime in the pam universe is wasting my time.

Remember the story about the Patio and their fancy-shmancy baby turnips and new england marinated veal strips with kiwi vinagrette? There was an article in the paper that they are trying to re-vamp their menu to make it more accessible and cheaper. wah! I am a restaurant activist. I think they should offer me free visits to check out the new menu and give commentary.

Insects
I'm having some insect issues. What does this mean? First I saw an ant in my room -- of course while I'm doing my yoga practice. The next day I saw two and if history has taught me anything, that means the whole trail of swarming ants taking over is not far away. So far, hasn't manifested. Then yesterday I was mixing my breakfast meusli which I make with oats from the bins and then adding in trail mix and the trail mix bag was filled with fruit flies. Gave me the heebees. I had to toss everything in a bag in a bag and then, like bleach the container and now I don't want to eat that stuff. My favorite breakfast, ruined.

Tonight we watched part of this VH1 Behind the Music thing on 1987. It was too damn funny. They talked about current events/politics and related it to music. So you've got the stock market crash of 1987 cut to: Bon Jovi. And then they do a big Iran-Contra bit cut to: Beastie Boys. The simplification of modern history. Too funny.

I viewed the history part with an odd POV because there I was post college person dealing with a supposed adult existence and I was so friggin self-absorbed -- these history events seem like a dream. ah, to be in my 20's again. Just kidding. Wouldn't go back for anything.

I don't know who reads this or how often, but I don't assume I have too many regulars. Regardless, I find that I am always editing myself -- things that I wouldn't hesitate to write to myself in private I wouldn't dream of alluding to in this space. And when I was thinking about this - I wondered what my purpose was, I mean, why shouldn't I edit myself? Do people really want to see the unedited brain dump of any person willing to throw it out there? Especially someone like me who spends so much time analysing her brain.

Today my computer is acting weird or else the Internet is acting weird but I can't stand being online today. I'm having wrist issues again on my mouse hand so I don't know when I'm going to finish moving the pamnewsletters over. I'm up to v. 3. Whenever I feel like it, I guess.

It's been a great weekend so far. Friday night I went with Bob to the Waterfront Blues Festival and saw a band called something like Wild Magnolias from New Orleans and I called them "Las Vegas Indians" because of their outfits. It was super fun -- I love events where all ages of people are having a good time dancing and enjoying music -- is there any other artistic medium that compares in terms of group interaction?

Yesterday we went to Tacoma to visit Phil to talk about RTG XI and then we went to the Washington State History Museum to see the Woody Guthrie exhibit which I cannot more highly recommend. What an amazing life. Even if you have zero interest in folk music, you can't ignore his amazing contributions or the impact he had on so many artists. I found it particularly ironic that such completely non-American artists like Billy Bragg and U2 had so much to say about him. I mean, can you imagine someone like Steven Tyler talking about some random British guitar strummer from over 50 years ago?

The Museum is amazing in itself. A beautiful facilty, well built and nicely organized. On the one hand I was sad to see it so dramatically underused -- a Saturday and it was a snap to park in the lot and we could cruise the exhibit at our leisure without worrying about other visitors -- so at the same time I was happy to enjoy it without pushing and shoving and being annoyed by people in my way. I'm not into folk music but it made me want to invest a little time listening to his work.

Bob sent me this yesterday: Lincoln's Gettysburg PowerPoint Presentation. It's too damn funny. We don't have to use Power Point at my office (thank God) and I rarely have to sit through a presentation but based on my extremely limited exposure, I loathe it.

I don't know why I always think I have can post only when I have something to say. Why can't I just sit here and type if it pleases me?

Yesterday I got myself worked into the most godawful snit which made me feel like crap all day long. Sometimes I wonder if it's worth the effort since I don't seem to becoming any more evolved or any better at asking for what I want. In fact, I just sit here and beat myself up for wanting anything. I know, veering awfully close to a public confession of neuroses -- wasn't the world a lot better place when people kept these things to themselves and it was considered impolite not to?

Happy 4th. Today we're going out towards Mt. Hood for a gathering and then on the way home we're going to Jimmy's for a party with a band. I think it will be a fun day.

I'm going to take a few minutes here and catch up on some blogging things and not boring things about my new domain which is the center of my computer existence right now, but I'm sure mindnumbing for you to read endless updates on.

REUNION
(why does that word look not spelled right?)
The announcement for my 20 year HS reunion just went up and Cherie sent me the URL for www.classmates.com. Am I the last person alive who has heard of this site? Where have I been? I logged on immediately and was glued to the screen for like 8 hours until my eyeballs dried up and rolled back into my head. Almost half of my graduating class is listed. I'm having a hard time with the $30 gold membership thing -- (a) on principle I don't pay for access to web content; (b) I hate to pay for a year when I doubt I'd use it that much; and (c) I don't think it's set up very optimally and it's slower than hell which was why it took me 8 hours and I managed to catch up on my New Yorkers pile while I was waiting between clicks to look at the info boxes of everyone in my class who had one. I'll probably end up caving, but we'll see. Maybe they'll negotiate. I'd pay $12 for a year.

This whole development got me digging out my old yearbooks -- and for some reason I can only find freshman year and senior year. My senior year has the last issue of the school paper in it with the senior wills and for some reason I don't have one in there and I don't know why. I remember writing one -- but that could be a made up memory. I have no idea where the other two yrbooks are and I know my senior prom bid and the graduation program are stuck somewhere too. I don't save a lot of stuff, but these things I did save. It's kind of weird to be thinking about these people after 20 years -- but it's a good weird. I'm looking forward to the reunion since I missed the 10 year because I'd just moved up here and was about a trillion dollars in debt and my income was like 50 cents a week so flying down to LA was out of the question.

WHERE ARE ALL THE BATHING SUITS?
I have been desperately trying to find a bathing suit for a month now. I've been to the Jantzen store, that bathing suit store downtown, 2 different Nordstroms, 3 different Meier and Franks and a jumble of discount stores and I can't find squat. At this point I don't even mind paying a lot of money if I can find what I like. I want a modestly cut bikini and I want underwires in the top and I want cute colors, preferably dark. I can't find squat. It's either not my size, or it's cut so half my ass hangs out or my boobs are bulging out, or else it's really ugly colors. It's been very frustrating.

THE PLUMBER
Last week we needed the plumber to come over because we had this incredibly slow draining sink that I had poured two different products "guaranteed to cure any slow drains" -- one was a toxic-waste product and the other an organically friendly enzyme thing. Both were equally worthless. Also the faucet in our kitchen had turned into a trickle so that if you wanted to fill a pot with water to cook pasta, you could stick it under there and go an take a nap and come back and it would be almost full. The last thing that concerned us was our water bill showed our usage almost doubled the last two billing periods and we didn't think we were using twice as much water.

Gene came over to look at our stuff for us. He is this cool old guy -- who should be retired and he told us he would be in about 3 months. I liked him because he took the time to visit with us and asked about flower in the yard and the sandwich creation that Bob was making and he knew some of our neighbors and told us about some history he shared with them. It was actually nice to have the plumber over.